Monday

Yesterday afternoon and this morning, I have done all the checkers and the pens, and I feel 1000 times better about it.
Keegan has been very patient and let's me try more than once without even fussing about it.
It already seems to be second nature to HIM, which is the blessing.
Tomorrow we go for dietary counseling and I think this will help a lot.
If you have ever grocery shopped for a diabetic child at Cub-it sucks.
Low fat does not mean low carb.
Low sugar does not necessarily mean low carb.
Sugar-free is almost non-existent. And uh, it doesn't taste so great.
I am sure once I find out more, I will know where to shop and what to shop for.
Today, because that is all I can concentrate on, I have his meals and snacks planned.
Tomorrow, I will think about, well, tomorrow.
I am having a hard time writing right now, and I know that's because I am still digesting everything.  I am trying not to be too hard on myself because as his mom, I worry.
It feels calmest to take it one step at a time.
What would we have done if I had to work right now?
Do you see the "plan" that has been laid out for us, even with just that one PIECE?
I do.
I am slowly starting to reach out for support. I have found a support group of parents that meet once a month. I will try that in December.
Right now, the biggest comforts are messages from moms who have been exactly where I am right now:  new, confused, sad, bewildered, thankful, amazed, changed.
There is a woman on Etsy who is making a bracelet for me. Her son has had Type 1 since he was 3.  I have had more solace from the words that she wrote to me the other day.
We are not alone.
I still ache all the time for Keegan.
Will continues to be a loving, strong, kind husband.
If your child develops Type 1 diabetes, I recommend a good partner.  Get the best one you can, even if you have to throw out the old one.
Seriously.
Luckily, mine is incredible. I will keep him.
I don't feel zingy or clever right now as I write. I feel like a worried mom.
But I do know that today is a good day.
That's enough for now.