Well Well Well

So I have been writing this blog for almost two years now and finally finally I have some international recognition...see posted comment two blogs ago.
I have no idea what the comment means..I am a little nervous that the Brit that wrote it might be using the Butt Paste for something other than babies' bottoms..because I do not trust ANYONE online..but in any case he called my blog "brilliant" and I will take the compliment..because I really only write this for myself and Will and a few family members who laugh..
I do not write this for Keegan..well, I mean I do, if he wants to read it when he is 21 and it suddenly occurs to him that maybe his mom might be a little different than other moms and so he needs to check her "blog" for the "other side of the story" but this is NOT his scrapbook, his six photo albums from the first year of his life or the 1000 beautiful sappy wonderful stories that I have about him..I share those verbally, write them in his albums and keep record OTHER PLACES..so if someone reads this and thinks this is a tribute to my life as a mother..the WHOLE mother..get off now..please..

This is my blog where I write about the wacky zany shit that happens to me on a daily basis and that if I had to keep in my head, I would go completely cuckoo ..Not to mention the fact that I cannot drip through life thinking everything is a Hallmark Hall of Fame presentation or a book for Oprah to recommend. I spent YEARS of my life miserable, wretched and worn out..I prefer to tongue-in-cheek-it with a glass of wine in my hand for the next 70 years. God knows this and so does Will. That is why Will married me. At least I think so. Maybe Will isn't so sure now and he is secretly trying to make plans for a getaway..but if he is..he isn't moving too fast, so I think I am right on this..


Tomorrow is Mother's Day..my second one and what I would really like to do is go to church, drink champagne.. (NO NOT AT CHURCH, they don't allow that..I have googled every church in the area and not ONE of them serves mimosas, dammit!)
Go shopping, get my horrible eyebrows waxed because I am starting to look like one of those women from that religious compound down in Texas...get a pedicure, buy a cute spring outfit and have a nice dinner with my darling baby and husband.
I am hopeful..but this is what I realized early on in Motherhood..YOU do not make the schedule..THE BABY makes the schedule..I know for a fact that Keegan is upstairs in his crib right now pretending to nap and making his own agenda for tomorrow:

Mother's Day:
Wake up extra early
Will not eat oatmeal..but will eat peaches to throw them off making them think I don't like the kind of oatmeal they bought, thus forcing Momma to run to store in weird looking pajama pants for different kind while I chew on spoon and grin..
Will take normal morning nap to make them think everything is back on track.
Lunch time I will eat all of my noodles and NONE of the corn, but some of the peas and then take all of the carrots one by one and drop them to the floor for the cats.
Cats do not eat carrots, I know this, but enjoy dropping things off my tray anyway.
Will attempt to climb stairs when no one is looking thus causing argument between Mom and Dad as to why a "real gate" has not been purchased instead of the two chairs that are being used which I am able to push out of the way with my super human baby strength.

Oh and so on and so on..because notice we hadn't even gotten to church at that point..or anything else.
But honestly, the best thing about this whole Motherhood gig is looking forward to each day. I was not always like that.
I mean, yes, I liked Uptown and looked forward to each new restaurant and bar (ha!) and once I met Will I was OVER THE MOON about each day..but now with Keegan EVERY DAY is a holiday..because he does something amazingly unique and new and "take my breath away-ish I don't know how I could love you more-ish"

So I will forgive him the fact that I might be a uni-brow Mom for a little while longer.
Happy Mother's Day.