Stuck

One of our favorite books to read at night is called Stuck by Oliver Jeffries. Floyd's kite winds up in a tree. Rather than climb up and get his kite, he starts lobbing all sorts of things into the tree to get the kite down:  a ladder, a saw, a cat, a fireman, a fire truck, a house, a neighbor, etc. etc.
I'm a bit like Floyd sometimes.
I get something stuck in my tree, and I end up throwing 180 more "things" up there, rather than just putting a ladder against the tree, climbing up and snatching the kite down.
When this happens I can't write.
Diabetes has been in my tree.
School has been in my tree.
Marriage has been in my tree.
Motherhood, money, exercise.
Friends. Family.
Society.
That's a lot in a tree.
Sometimes I throw therapy up there. Sometimes I throw booze. I've tried tears, shame, anger, guilt.
Then I've tried laughter, patience, prayer, love, understanding.
Those are working the best.
(I still like booze; I'm not gonna lie, but it doesn't help get anything unstuck..just sayin')
Most of the time I realize that there is always going to be something up that tree.
Will wishes it was the cat.
I wish it was all of our bills-PAID.
And diabetes. I wish that was up there for GOOD.  FOREVER. GOODBYE!
But the beauty of being stuck is the feeling when I am not so stuck anymore.
Maybe it's just small things:  all the kids were asleep by 7:30 AND NO ONE WOKE UP IN THE NIGHT.
We watched a whole football game together and no one got annoyed at anyONE for asking questions.
I just found the CUTEST skirt for 17.00 on Banana Republic!!
Or maybe it's knowing that when a Monday at school doesn't go the way it's planned there are some really great friends who help me remember that what's important is NOT at school.
Whatever it is (and yes, I know, where to draw my thanks-thanks) I am thankful for less of a stuck feeling and more of a "I can do this" feeling.
Even if just "doing this" is getting my kids home, feeding them and getting them to bed.
Hey, it's one less thing in the tree.