Devil in Disguise (And I Mean that Lovingly)

Dear Lord, I have finger cramps because I am typing so fast. I know that baby Kieran is going to wake up and want to eat and I need to get this down before it flies out of my head. I have been zinging around for the past two hours like a whirling dervish trying to get everything done: bills, dishes, laundry because Maren is napping and Keegan is playing Lego made-up Batman, tornadoes, Ninjago and I know once Maren and Kieran get up it is bye-bye Melissa-time.
And really paying bills and laundry is crap-Melissa time.  Any REAL Melissa time flew out the window in 1987 when I got myself into this gig...it wasn't really 1987 but it feels like it.
Don't get me wrong, I am embracing my Eight is Enough Mom status. I really love it.
I watched that show religiously every day after school and I realize now, that I probably was meant to have this many children. I am better with more than less because I am a true blue organizer and right now, I have a place for every single effing thing in this house.  I even have a place to put Will when he comes home. It's his recliner downstairs. Perfect.  So I feel pretty in control, honestly.
Our Great Uncle Bud passed away and it's really sad because he was a sweet funny lovely man. He always had a tame wild (is that possible-I think that's an oxymoron) anyway, he always tamed a wild baby deer in the spring and he was so gentle. Keegan loved him. He had cancer and didn't have much longer, so it's a blessing that he went peacefully. The visitation and funeral are on Saturday. This will be our first trip as a family of five back to Wisconsin. This will also be our first visitation as a family of five.
Sigh.
Keegan did this with Grandpa Woody and he was wonderful.
We left one year old Maren back with Grandma Linda and Grandpa John.
We weren't going to take any chances that she'd fall in the grave hole.
I know, I am crude, but she is a devil and she does things that normal children don't.
Last night I specifically said to Will. "Are there going to be urns at this place because I'm just sayin'...."
He gave me such a look of horror.."Who ARE you?"
"Will. She will get into things. She might leave a Cinderella in the coffin for Uncle Bud. I am not trying to be disrespectul. Uncle Bud had a good sense of humor. You know that..I am just stating a fact that when it comes to Maren we don't know what to expect. Like right now she is in the bathroom eating toothpaste. Do you notice how quiet it got?"
Later that evening after dinner, Will was in charge of dessert. We try really hard to monitor sweets with Keegan. I don't buy much candy. Tic tacs, gum and life savers are a big deal for us. Once in a while I will find ice cream that's low carb. The individual Kemps dipping dots are GREAT.  If he eats a relatively low carb meal, he can have a cookie or two. We really try to balance.
I broke down at Christmas and bought each of them a small tube of mini M and M's but I put them away.
Will got them out. Gave Maren and Keegan about ohhhh I don't 8-9.. Nothing to worry about..
until..
"I put em n em in my nose..."
"What the?"
Jesus Lord.
Keegan: "She did. She put it in her nose."
"Get her Will. See if she will blow it out." Surprisingly, having a third child has done wonders for my nerves. I just don't get uptight about much...honestly.
Cool as the other side of the pillow.
"Blow, honey. Maren, blow your nose for Daddy."
Red mini m and m.....juuuuuuust inside her nose. You could see it. Probably looked a lot like when I was pushing out her brother...just sayin'.
Aaaaand then... out.
"Now do you see why she just can't stay long at the funeral home?"
"Yes. Ok. Yes."
"She's a devil Will. A beautiful devil in disguise. I mean not a REAL devil, but you know what I'm saying...."