Yesterday

all my troubles seemed so-...
I have never liked that song.  Who wants to believe in yesterday? I loathe living in the past...
Anyway, yesterday was my worst day so far on 16 days of bed rest-only 75 to go until his due date..I am SURE I will be completely rock solid mentally when this is all over. Rock Solid. Sigh...
I could not stop crying. I sat in the rocking chair and stared out the window and cried. Isn't that just a horribly, depressing vision?  At least when I get old and I am sitting in a chair crying and staring out the window, I will have a stash of booze with me.
Rebecca took Keegan to Auntie Bett's Boo Bash, which he hasn't missed in FOUR years.  And Vicky started painting the baby's room. I think seeing my friends yesterday really threw me for a loop.  I am SO OUT of the loop. It just feels weird.
And I have been really sad about Maren moving out of the crib and in with her brother. I think it's that she's my baby girl and now, she can't be anymore. I mean, she can, but it's kind of time for her to grow up a little too.  Some of this seems so sudden. I mean, I THOUGHT I was prepared for what was coming, but yesterday made me feel like I am not ready at all.  And I am especially not ready for another two and a half months of THIS.
Today I feel better. I don't like to think of this as "mood swings."  Let's just call it "acceptance".
Vicky is coming to finish the baby's room, and I think it will be nice to have the nursery done.
Maren is napping in her big girl bed with 32 dolls and stuffed animals, and the cat has decided he likes it down there with her (traitor).
Will is watching the Packers, Keegan is coloring and I am going to take a nap.  Today is definitely better than yesterday. Yup.