What I Know

I know a lot about divorce.
Wow, now that is really something to add to the resume! Are you going to put that before or after you talk about never missing an episode of The Real Housewives of Atlanta!
Solid!
Just hear me out.
I've been thinking about this a lot lately because most of my life, 33 years of it has been influenced by divorce.
Directly.
What's bothering me lately is that if someone hasn't had their parents leave each other, or signed the "final" papers, or watched a boyfriend/husband argue with the ex on the phone about the time with kids, I don't know...I'm not sure that anyone can really get what divorce is all about.  It's gut wrenching, life-changing, and okay...liberating sometimes. But mostly it just really sucks.
Everyone comes out of a break up differently. Some of us heal quickly. Some of us take years. Some of us may never ever get over what happened to us.
But until you have experienced it for yourself, it really isn't for anyone else to judge.
We all heal differently:  loudly, quietly, or here's all your shit on your sister's lawn  I am moving in with my brother, just wait until I meet my best wife.  (Oh sorry I got carried away for a minute....)
Even though it's very easy to want to make decisions for people because we think we can because we think we know best. We can't.
Ooooh..this is hard. Look, I solve the world's problems every day. Believe me, if everyone would just listen to me, it would be a whole lot easier.
But, uh, that doesn't seem to be happening.
So probably I do NOT know best in every situation.
What I am learning is that old dogs do not necessarily learn new tricks.
Young dogs don't necessarily care to either.
Until they are ready.
And some dogs may never be ready.  And that isn't for me to judge.
So I guess when I am thinking about people going through difficult times, I am learning that it's their right to handle things the way that they want. It's not my place to decide for them how to grieve or judge if it's right or wrong.
I do think it's my place to hold their hand if they need me to, and let them know I will always be there to love them.
 Maybe give them a good pat or a treat. You know, something like that.
I still wouldn't put it on a resume.
I wasn't going to! Sheesh...so hard on me subconscious..