Well, it's time for our annual fake Christmas letter!
Whew! Where to begin...let's start with the good news.
Maren Vada Williams was born on June 16th 2010 at 4:28 pm. She was an induced baby and that is the last time she has been prompted to do anything. Maren is her own woman. She loves food. She loves her brother. She loves to sleep.
Maren Vada has been an absolute gift to us. Having a daughter is one of the very best blessings God has given us.
As long as we're on the subject of blessings, let's talk about Keegan Michael. We like to call him "Keeg" "Keega" "Leega" or "Farty." He is the funniest, smartest, cleverest, silliest boy in the universe. He loves He-Man, Darth Vadar, Luke Skywalker, Bolt, frogs, elephants, dinosaurs, and all of his Grandparents. His dad is his best buddy. And he tells his mom that she's beautiful. He LOVES his Maren Vada. Keegan Michael is one of those little boys that "says the darndest things" and you hope you write them all down, but sometimes you are laughing so much, you forget.
You know, this letter is off to a pretty NORMAL start...why don't you just try a real one this year.
SHUT UP.
Let's talk about what's really going on..
1. I lost my wallet Friday and I have no ID, credit cards or make up. I KEPT MY MAKE UP IN MY WALLET!!!!!!(It was more like a wristlet...ok??? Not like a flat wallet..you know what I'm saying right???)
Do you realize if I leave the house, I have no way to prove my identity other than an old YMCA ID and no way to cover ANY blemishes?????????
2. While digging through the car yesterday desperately searching for said lost wallet, I locked the keys in the car.
I kept the spare key in the car too.
I KEPT THE SPARE KEY IN THE CAR TOO!!!!!!!!!
(Who does that?)
Sigh. I don't need anymore criticism. Thanks.
Will has completely stopped talking to me after the $65.00 payment to "pop-a-lock" by the way...
3. We have no family pictures for a Christmas card. I have attached the best picture I have of Maren and Keegan. MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It's like I had the children with Mr. Magoo.
Never mind paying a professional photographer. I HAVE NO METHOD OF PAYMENT NOW ANYWAY...
I am sure there is some humorous lesson in all of this.
Right?? Right???
Sigh......................................
Well, anyway, Merry Christmas Everyone.
I know. I know.
I will order new credit cards.
Will can take one of those "timer" pictures later this week, and I am sure people can live with last minute Christmas cards.
I am pretty sure he will be talking to me by March because we booked our honeymoon, and chances are he will want to spend it with me, and yes, I have learned my lesson about the spare key and the car...I know I know...
So, thank God for love, family, friends, laughter and health. Because through it all, I am blessed to have that.
Even if I feel like a complete dumb shit.
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