BUST-ed

So I went over to the Y today to get my run in.
No, I am not going to start writing about my running. Running is like my sex life. Private.
You can assume I do it regularly. You can assume I must be pretty good at it if I continue to do it, and that I enjoy it. That's as much as anyone needs to know about my running.  And in my opinion, that's all anyone needs to know about anyone's running, unless you are a professional athlete.
Okay, so I went over to the Y, and checked in.
"Do you have a shirt?"
Now, when someone asks one a question like this and one is 12 weeks pregnant, here are the FIRST, the very first thoughts, that go through one's head.
"Holy shit. Pregnancy brain has set in. I didn't put on a top. I'm topless at the Y."
After glancing down briefly and realizing one DID put on a top, the second thought through the pregnant lady's head is:
"Oh my god. She wants me to put on a shirt because people at the Y are grossed out by my baby bump. I've only gained four pounds. Am I that disgusting already?"
The third thought is:
"No, I don't have a shirt."
"No I don't have a shirt."
"Well we require shirts. You can't wear just a sports bra."
"Okay. Um, I didn't know this. I have been coming to the Y off and on for 4 years. No one has ever told me I need a shirt."
AND I HAVE BEEN WEARING SPORTS BRAS THE WHOLE TIME!!!!!
"No one has ever stopped you?"
Now, this is where I got really pissed.  And yes, I am riding the wild Hormone Train right now so I reeeeeallllllly had to take a deep breath.
"No, no one has ever stopped me."
Fuckin' A- lady, and pardon my french but don't you think if someone HAD stopped me before now, I would BE WEARING A SHIRT?????!!!!  Do I look like that much of a rule breaker???
"Well, it's on our thing that you need to wear a shirt, so just remember for next time."
"Oh, yes. Of course. Your thing.  A shirt. Next time."
Your THING? It's on your THING?  What thing?   A t-shirt? A mug? A sign? A tattoo?
What THING????? I have never seen this THING!!!!!
And the "just remember for next time." OOOOOOHHHHHH..that bugs the crap out of me. Do not talk to a pregnant soon to be 40 year old woman with that tone.
I am liable to run naked on your stupid treadmills.  Boobs flopping. Belly jiggling.
Idiot.
I went upstairs to do my run, and sure enough.  There were no jog bras in sight.
But, I'm sorry. I have NEVER in my life paid attention to what anyone else is wearing. And I get the whole proper attire rule.  Look, I teach middle school.  Proper attire is my life.
It just grated a little.
As I left I beamed (probably high-beamed her too, in my bra!  Hahaha) and called,"SEE YOU NEXT TIME!"
Sucking lemons look from her.  Whatever. You and your "thing" won't keep me down!!
Here's the kicker.  As I was pulling out of the parking lot, a man came running up to the Y entrance, bare-chested, holding his shirt in his hand.
"Better get that shirt on before you get inside!" I bellowed.
The air conditioner was on. He couldn't hear me.
Don't worry. She's ready for him. Her and her "thing".